Section 2
COT 

Anger & Rage:  Purging Toxic Emotions

Anger is a normal part of life, but it seems Christians often feel it's an abomination to feel it. All the more if we find ourselves spewing rage from a seemingly endless pit. Such was the case with a woman we'll call Sue. Please read our correspondence discussing her struggle with anger and rage:

"Paula,

I continue to struggle with rage and anger... I've been crying all day....  I had a hallucination of a massive venting pipe in my bedroom. It was huge!!! So I do what I always do, searched the word "vent" in the bible and it led me to Job 10.... It is exactly how I feel... except Job wasn't as sinful as me .. I even thought yesterday if I could have sewn up the womb of my mother to prevent me from being birthed I would have. As I am saying this I recall a coworker speaking to me these words "if I had your life I think I would crawl back into my mother's womb" and I  just laughed and agreed with him in my spirit..... it's funny that that comes to my mind. I was in my 30s then... Job 10 is how I feel. Not sure what I'm supposed to do with this emotion.

~Sue"


"Dear Sue,

There's so much going on in you right now. Your soul is clearly loaded (overloaded) with toxic emotions and since you're connecting / aligning with God's reality more and more, these toxins are stirred up and being addressed by the Spirit of Christ in you. They are reacting to the increased presence of truth and glory that's begun taking over your soul. As the good of Christ in you prospers, the toxic emotions/memories are being forced out. They cannot remain. 

What you are going through now is a process (obviously). All the anger and rage, hurt and violations that have been buried are being excommunicated from your soul. Again, as Christ increases in your soul, your anti-christ programming of self-loathing and all else is being purged so the correct programming can take its place. 


(This is overstating the obvious, but) let it out and let it go. Cry and scream for the pain that it all was, telling the violations and assaults that the redemptive power of Christ has rescued you, thanking God for His love that you are finally coming to relate to in a real way, praising God that though this life hurts, greater is HE that is in you than all the hurts in the world combined, and praise Him that someday we'll all be with Him in paradise where there will no longer be hurts. 


ALSO REPENT for questioning and loathing God's sovereignty over your life. Tell Him to do whatever it takes to change your perspective about how you have been seeing things, including despising the day you were born. I know Job was venting and this is what you are doing, which God understands, but it also is a matter of rebellion to loathe your birth, as this is challenging the Author of life and all things.


Look how despite God saying Job's three accusers were the ones he was displeased with, God serioulsy rebukes Job for questioning His sovereignty (Job 38-41). So, though God certainly understands all your venting and the course of defeat your soul took, as well as your hatred for it, it is time to repent and humble yourself to the sovereignty of God over your life. 

Doing all this will let the LIGHT take over your soul once and for all. And the day will come where this rage won't exist in you. Of course, it won't all come out at once. Remember, as more of God and truth goes in, it uncovers and stirs the toxic emotions/memories. Right now, it may be a HUGE chunk that's being vented out / forced out of your soul by God's reality taking over. But it's not all of it. So, down the road you'll have other venting sessions. But they'll decrease in intensity, you'll be quicker to release and process them out, and you certainly will be far less disturbed with what's coming out now that you realize what's going on.


Does this make sense?


~Paula"


"Paula,

YES it makes so much sense to me... Thank you for responding to me, I so needed to hear these words of life and truth. I feel that the Lord is wanting me to let go of a lot that is inside. That I have never allowed myself to be angry. I also feel that although I can be angry and let it out, I feel that the Holy Spirit is saying to choose to Love and to choose to let TRUTH in my life. It's been a lifetime of believing lies and not allowed to feel or voice anger towards all the injustice. I keep asking the Lord about Justice. What is it what does it look like?  And I was pondering this today. Am I angry that there was no Justice? No one paid for what was done and is still being done. And I thought to myself would I want my enemies to go through what they put me through? And I decided I would not want to hurt anyone that way. I feel I'm so immature in seeing the real enemy!!! That Satan is behind this attack on my life..."

~Sue

"Sue,

Wow, you really are making progress! Identifying that you have never allowed yourself to be angry is a HUGE step in the prosperity of your soul!"

Okay, let's look closer at what's going on:

  1. ​  Sue was perplexed because of all the anger and rage surfacing.  Experiencing the purging of toxic emotions can make you feel like something's wrong with you. But this is normal. It's no different than when someone gets food poisoning and they vomit it out. Better out than in, but not so pleasant a process, unfortunately. So, the first thing Sue hopefully realized was she didn't need to fear that she was regressing or off on an emotional sin tangent.
  2. The second thing Sue hopefully realized was the reason she was in that state of temporary emotional chaos. Though this isn't always the case, I knew that Sue had been working diligently with the Lord, seeking Him and meditating for two months on the truths taught in this program. Having experienced this myself and with the help of Holy Spirit, I instantly recognized this was a purging of toxic emotions. So, if you have a history of repressed hurt and anger, despite being emotionally sound on the norm, don't be surprised that the more you press in to truth, the more it will take over your soul and force the toxins out.
  3. We see that Sue realizes her propensity to not allow herself to feel angry. This is a classic strategy of the dark kingdom. Genuine Christians are often extremely sensitive about doing wrong, especially concerning areas of the heart. So, being angry seems like a sin when you're in the heat of it. It feels like you're the one doing something wrong. How we handle our anger is often sinful, so it's easy to mix everything up and feel guilty for simply being angry. The dark kingdom knows this all too well and plays on it, taunting sensitive believers, driving them into guilt for having legitimate angst concerning something. It's an easy way to tangle a believer up, which hinders their confidence in Christ. But the truth is Ephesians 4:26 says, "Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath".  Anger is allowed. So, it's important to not allow the enemy to make us feel guilty for being angry anymore.
  4.  We see Sue questioning if part of the reason for her anger is injustice. Clearly, this is always a part of things. She goes on to question if, in her anger for the lack of justice, if she would do likewise to her offenders, to which she said no. So, this shows that Sue is not harboring unforgiveness or resentment. It shows she is simply and rightfully angry over the wrong being done. She is angry just as Ephesians 4:26 permits, but not unforgiving, bitter, or full of vengeance. It's possible she has had moments of feeling these, but ultimately, Sue chooses the way of the kingdom of God. Therefore, she will surely see justice. Not because she is chasing it; but because it's God's way. Let me share that there have been three different people on three very different occasions who wickedly lied about me to the judge/magistrate presiding over court cases I was involved in. Two of them ended up dying very tragic, horrific deaths that I would not wish on my worst enemy. I'd even prayed God would forgive them for what they'd done years before either of them faced death. I'm not saying God did it. I honestly don't know what to make of it. I'm just sharing what happened. Wicked people that do not get off their wicked paths will sadly see horror - if not in this life, the next.
  5. We see that God revealed how, despite the legitimacy of Sue's anger, her turning it against herself and loathing the very ordination of her life is a form of rebellion. It's a lack of submission to the sovereignty of God. If we presume to curse anything God does, this is inadvertantly coming against Him and is wrong. Though it is understandable to feel the pain over what's happening, it is still wrong to rise up in contempt against anything God does, including placing you in this world.

If you have repressed anger, it will eventually need to come out. In fact, like I told Sue, the deeper into truth you go, the more truth you digest, the more the buried anger will be forced out. So, here's a breakdown (mentioned above) of what you can do to overcome and be sure to move forward in your journey in Christ:

  • Let it out and let it go
  • Cry and scream for the pain that it all was
  • Tell the violations and assaults that the redemptive power of Christ has rescued you
  • Thank God for His love that you are beginning to relate to in a real way
  • Praise God that though this life hurts, greater is HE that is in you than all the hurts in the world combined
  • Praise God that someday we'll all be with Him in paradise where there will no longer be any hurts
  • Repent for challenging or daring to curse God's sovereign will for you to be born (if applicable)

​Amen.